Reflections on Friendship

Today, I spilled a whole cup of Pepsi (regular sized) all over my friend's pants. One minute, I was walking along with a tray of food in KFC towards the table and the next minute *Disaster*. The tray was smoother than I gave it credit for and the cup slid down ever so smoothly and *Splash*. The thoughts that raced through my head was 'Oh shit, buy another pair of pants, we're in Jusco... oh crap'. Yes, yes, I have paranoid genes. Fortunately, my friend just shook it off nonchalantly and we changed to another table, cleaned up and the day proceeded as uneventfully as though it has never happened.

Ah, friends. I'm sure everyone has friends, and everyone has different expectations of friends. Based on your past experiences, your temperamants and the way you were taught, you probably have different approaches towards friends. I was by nature, a loner, but somehow, over the years, by God's grace, I have been blessed with many good friends. The learning curve was very painful; there were betrayals and hurts which seemed to take forever to heal but somehow new friendships acted as a balm towards past hurts.

I guess for myself, there are many factors that contribute to a good friendship:
The first factor I feel is acceptance. A true friend knows all your good points and all the 'shit' you are capable of, and yet, accepts you as a whole person.
The second factor is making time for each other. Just as plants need sunlight, water and nutrients to grow, so cultivating a friendship requires setting apart time to spend with one another; despite one's busy schedule.
A third factor that comes to mind, is good friends look out for one another's interests. Isn't it great when you're feeling down in the dumps, sorry for yourself and depressed like crazy; and out of a blue, a friend just calls and say, 'Hey, man, how are you? Let's go out of a drink. . .' It drives away those stormy clouds of depression like a blower blowing away dust.

I guess I could think of much more virtues that constitute a great friendship but I'd have to say all of them pale in comparison with forgiveness. It is inevitable as human beings that we will encounter conflict at one time or another; and tread on one another. The closest friendships can hurt the most at times; but good friends learn to forgive one another and thereby grant the other person freedom to move on and grow.

Ha ha, looking a what I've written, I think most of the time, I have failed by my own standards but I'm glad I have friends who know how to forgive a crappy buddy.

One should not give up on making friends for whatever reason. We do not exist alone on this earth and it is not possible for us to know everything. We are interdependant beings. Having friends opens your eyes to new ways of thinking, ideas and experiences that we are unable to experience in this complex world and it's wealth of information. Friends enrich our lives by their company. I guess, the most important lesson about developing good friendships is before you go out seeking for good friends, you must learn to be one yourself.