Friday, August 18, 2006


Most Malaysia Chinese (well, the younger generation mostly) are familiar with this phrase called FFK; short for 'fong fei kei' which in the Cantonese dialect means 'let go aeroplanes'. I believe this phrase has some sexual connotations to it( I could be wrong) since it is quite similar to another phrase 'TFK' which means masturbation. Anyway, if someone ffk-s you, it means they've stood you up or cancelled an appointment on you without telling you. (Many thanks to Andrew for correcting me)

What irks me is that some people have the notion that it's okay to FFK with disregard for the consequences. Parents do it to their children. Spouses do it to one another. Some friends do it all the time. Dating couples do it at their peril. Familiar post-FFK phrases would sound like this:

Parents: 'I'm sorry, dear, but mummy/daddy had something (more important) to do, so we have to do this next time, okay'

Spouses: 'Oh dear, I'm sorry, I won't be able to didn't make it for the anniversary, I had some important stuff to do...'

Friends: 'He he, sorry lar I'm afraid something came upI cannot make it lar today. My girlfriend has something on. You'll understand, won't you.'

When you FFK, you send out several messages:

  1. My word cannot be trusted
  2. There are more important things than keeping my word with you
  3. In the natural hierarchy of relationships, you are less important
  4. I'm taking it for granted that you will understand me
There is a saying, Do unto others what you will have them do unto you. You reap what you sow. FFK is an action that only starts a chain reaction which is probably why many people do it nowadays. If you notice, people's word and promises do not hold much water these days, showing the lack of integrity in society these days.

You won't win any prizes for guessing why I'm blogging this. Yup, I've been stood up and made to wait like a fool for several hours yesterday in favor of someone's last minute discovered and seemingly 'more important' event. And damn right, I'm pissed...


weiwei said...

Bro, I truly understand your feeling. So next time you hv appointment with this fella...prepare plan B...learning from experience. =)Cheers.

Las montañas said...

Glad u let it out.

For such cases, one time is enough. trust level with that person goes down by a few notches.

then its all communications... if the person bothers to call u even at last minute... then it all depends on what the more important last minute appt is.

Jonzz said...

sigh, i hate getting angry. But it's always when you least expect it, something gets to you. Like Jimbo says, blogging is an outlet of sorts.